Like so many things in life, being a homeowner is overrated. It makes you care about things you never previously thought twice about – damaging the paintwork on the bannisters, the condition of the fences, the unnerving progression of the weeds in your driveway. It makes you acutely aware of your property’s every last imperfection – the unevenness of some of the floors, the wobbly kitchen tap, the seemingly unshiftable black muck on the inner frame of the roof window.

I have spent the first four months in situ worrying that the house might be about to fall down. Is such a scenario covered by my insurance? Has this happened to anyone in the north Manchester area, ever? I have worried about my lack of innate gardening enthusiasm, I have lamented my ineptitude as a decorator, I have cursed myself for knocking over an incense stick and burning a small hole in my office carpet. Where once, the only thing that regularly bothered me was the f*****g estate agents, now I am awash with home-related insecurities. I crave nothing more than to get out and stay in a hotel for a few weeks. Easier said than done in the time of Covid.

Doubtless overtime my new responsibilities will start to feel less alien; my concerns over structural soundness will ease and I might actually start to enjoy this long-term living space. I am of course incredibly fortunate to have arrived at a position of being able to break the endless cycle of 12-month leases, incompetent landlords and various parties attempting to steal my deposit at the end of each tenancy. I should not be complaining. I will stop complaining.

Perhaps I am just overwhelmed by the series of life changes that have defined the past year since our move back to Manchester. Perhaps, like millions of others, I am getting a bit fed of having the terms of my existence dictated by a virus. Perhaps it’s better to just accept that, while 2020 will always stand as the year we bought our first home, it will also be a year to put behind us as quickly as we possibly can.

Photo credit: Markus Spiske